Tuesday, March 18, 2008

How To Kill A Witch

So - the answer - with a Reigate Bottle!

Yes, according to an article in Current Archaeology (UK), you just need a bottle - an aged bottles - some objects that will harm the witch - nine bent nails - some hair, wool fibres and leaves of some prickly grass, and then add the most critical ingredient: urine. Then bury to keep it nice and warm!

Yes, folk! To kill a witch you just have to stop her from going to the loo! And how do you know when your witch is dead - the bottle will explode!


So, read this fascinating, but brief, article - and who knows, maybe it might come in handy at Halloween!

29 comments:

Anonymous said...

God says there is a way to kill a witch, read Exodus 22:18, which says, "Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live." Likely, through stoning or burning, which were commanded under the old law of Moses. Also read Deuteronomy 18:10 and 1 Samual 15:23, which says that witchcraft is an abomination unto God. lw

Anonymous said...

i learned so much. ive killed many a witch. they r laying in my yard and on my fence post. i took their money and drivers license. this has been most usefull becuase im rich now. thank u. ive recently caught alive witch. she isw in a cage in my basement. i fear this. i dont know if she will get out. she will kill me in the night and take my genitals. help is much needed!!!!

Anonymous said...

Wow....I never thought that someone could be so....oh I don't know...RETARDED!!! I am Wiccan, and I do realize that I shouldn't care what other people say, but when it comes to stupid and dangerous things like killing witches, it's almost worth reporting it to the police. We are just like you, only more excepting to other religions...And I don't give a hoot what your book says, it's bigger than mine and I'm sure I can find more flaws.

Anonymous said...

someone said...

"Wow....I never thought that someone could be so....oh I don't know...RETARDED!!! I am Wiccan, and I do realize that I shouldn't care what other people say, but when it comes to stupid and dangerous things like killing witches, it's almost worth reporting it to the police. We are just like you, only more excepting to other religions..."

Wicca is probably the sickest, stupidest and lamest magick religion ever thought off in history. It's practice tends to attack christians and other religions, but they themselves are no better than satanists. It's practices and beliefs were just fantasies of that "freakshow" of a fagot called Gardner. wiccan magic are just hand-me-downs from other grimoires and practices and wilst copied aren't even copied correctly. Wicca is just a "Harry Potter" fantasy for society's loosers and under-achievers. The only successful thing wicca has accomplished is destroy family lives and relationships by indoctrinating it's members to "let go" and forget other people such as family who oppose their views, and to make it's members feel like they are on top of the world. Even wicca's most sacred practices are reeking of BS and suggests "Narcistic" behaviour which sadly can be dangerous to other people. The Karmik law of three you say? Were did Gardner pick that up? on a paid vacation to india? I have yet to see a wiccan who isn't self-centered, immature and doesn't use his/her "playfull" magick for their own ends. No wonder a lot of people would love to see you all burn in a stake!! There are a lot more ways to do magick, even 10 times more powerfull than what your maggot Maguses teach you.. and it won't cost you people's respect or your soul..

Anonymous said...

I'm not a super religoius person, but at least wicca seems most interesting

Anonymous said...

Isn't it funny/dangerous how so-called Christians believe that it is okay to kill people of other religions for being satanist etc because they don't understand them. God specifically asks people not to kill in the Bible, not to only kill if you're more Christian than your victim. I'm agnostic, but I find alot of Christians incredibly ignorant. Next time you enter into a depate about which is the 'correct religion' and which are 'evil' ask yourselves this... which religion is responsible for the most deaths and attrocities since recorded history? That's right, Christianity! Fact!

Anonymous said...

idk y everyone is so afraid of witches! not all of us r bad and yes i said us! im a witch! a lost witch to b exact..... meanin i didnt knw i was a witch until i researched my family tree.... but like i said not all of us r bad some of us r good..... i help people. i heal them and i do spells for them... im a good witch and so r the few witches i knw

Anonymous said...

Wow.... All I can say is wow. And not really to the original post, but the other idiots that actually responded to it seriously. I'm a Pagan HPS and this is just silly.

Anonymous said...

I came across this link researching a myth I had once encountered in a children's story suggesting that witches could not go out in rain, because, like the bucket of water in The Wizard of Oz, it would cause them to dissolve. Just wondered if that belief was common. I normally wouldn't even comment, but wanted to address the suggestion that Christianity is responsible for the most deaths. Historical incidents, like the Crusades and Salem witch trials and various wars have been people using the name of Christianity to serve their own ends. That is NOT Christianity. Jesus sacrificed his life for humanity. And others who followed him also gave their lives in his name. That is Christianity. Christianity actually teaches radical ideas such as dying to self and loving your enemy, being patient and kind, not self-seeking, easily angered, keeping a record of wrongs or delighting in evil. Worth noting.

Viagra Online said...

are you serious when you talking about kill a witch, because the last time that I saw a real witch was when my aunt visit us, in nowdays we have something that is commonly called "tolerance", we're not ignorant neither nor savage, the witch hunt is over many years ago, we don't live in the dark age.
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Anonymous said...

I am a witch or a wiccan whatever you want to call me and as far as i know the ingrediants in this are used in a protection spell so i don't know where this came from but in my opinion its wrong. and whats more its wrong to want to kill someone else.

Anonymous said...

Let us remember that these things do exist and that there are consequences for everything.

D. Kick said...

Yep, that's right, folks someone wanted to call the police to report that someone posted how to kill a witch! Yep, that's right, by stopping the witch from peeing... yep, that's right, by... burying a bottle filled with pee... and nails... yep, ... Please, call the police about this, and also, please record it and post the conversation on youtube.

Anonymous said...

i think my girlfriend is a witch. i dont know what to do. how much piss do i need? should it be from a person with stds? which std is perferred? i am very scared i cant sleep at night!!!! she just called me to her house. should i get some rosemary? or garlic? i heard bullets dont work so should i decapitate her?

Anonymous said...

I am in the field of religious studies, and all I can say is wow. really people. are we fighting over how piss can kill people. I thought I had no life studying weird facts and religion, but you people remind me of why Im an atheist.

jones.10 said...

"i learned so much. ive killed many a witch. they r laying in my yard and on my fence post. i took their money and drivers license. this has been most usefull becuase im rich now. thank u. ive recently caught alive witch. she isw in a cage in my basement. i fear this. i dont know if she will get out. she will kill me in the night and take my genitals. help is much needed!!!!"

Don't worry, here's how to safely keep your live witch in the basement. Number 1.) Put lots of salt and iron around the cage and on the basement door. Salt and iron bleeds away at a witch's strength. Number 2.) Make sure there's no blood or bones in the basement, for witches are known to use blood for strength and bones for magic. Number 3.) Wrap a silver chain around the cage, since silver chains can be used to bind and imprison witches. 4.) When most of her strength is gone and she is at her weakest (it might take months, even years for all of her power to fade) burn her and destroy her heart. Do the same to the witches in your yard, too, it destroys their souls, stopping them from coming back to the world as spirits and possessing someone, or 'body-snatching' them.

Anonymous said...

You feel lik that im not a witch theses jeaous witches around my way has put a spell on me over my man now everytime i fall in love he leaves is that fare to me

Anonymous said...

I have one above me (live in apt Stouffville Canada), destroying both my son and my life.

Help !

Anonymous said...

I have one living above me, destroying both my life and my son's .

HELP !

VOOPY WICCAN )O( said...

why are you people so Hardcore sick asshole! ??? wait no offense... we are all the same as you all other humans! .... understand it.... and just think again if someone tells chritanity bad than you people will sew them or burn them at stake... soo assholes just watch your asses and remember what we cand do with our magick if someone curses our religion.... Thou we always use magick for the good of others NOW we will not keep quiet....! You kill one of us... Wait and watch.... one by one by my strength and our sisters together we will destroy your hole race you assholes! SO MIND IT !

Anonymous said...

Anyone interested in killing a witch should note that
1) A witch is someone who is stubborn, rebellion, gossips, condemns, and accuses others.
2) When someone disobey Jesus he/she is a witch/wizard.
3) Two things can kill a witch/wizard but before this happens you have to give your life to Jesus totally by confessing Him as your Lord and Savior.
4) When you pray to Jesus tell Him someone is disturbing your life. The body you have is the temple of God and it is where the Holy Spirit lives. Therefore, anything which is not from the All knowing Father, Almighty and All powerful Jehovah should bow at the mention of the name of Jesus.
5) First cover yourself, i.e., your body, soul, spirit, house, bed, food, clothing, yard, sexual organs, brain, heart, eyes, legs, with the blood of Jesus and the Fire of the Holy Spirit. Next, begin to call on the fire of the Holy Ghost and the blood of Jesus and ask the Holy Spirit to begin to burn to ashes any power, demon, witch/wizard, pestilence of darkness, animal of darkness, evil spirit, any negative force, marine spirits living inside of you, around your house, on top of your roof, in the ceiling, mention every place. Just continue to call on the fire and you will experience many attacks at the beginning but do not stop. They will want to distract your attention or confuse you. Do not listen to any friend/relative calling you while you are praying this hot prayer.
6) Speak to them that you are now in Christ and the word of God says old things have passed away and new things have began. who so ever troubles you shall be trouble. who ever harass you shall be harassed, God says He will contend with anyone contending with you and He will save your children (Isaiah 49:25). Also, All who are enraged at you will be put to shame and disgraced; those who contend with you will all die.(Isaiah 41:11)
7) Pray fire prayers every morning ask God to surround you, your home with fire and ask for the His heavenly warriors to surround you at night. God bless you and empower you to read and know the truth in His word (Bible) and confess healing to your life. Do not faint when you pray and nothing happens the first time. Continue and you will be a free man in Jesus' name, amen.

Anonymous said...

Witches are sooo real.Witches are very stubborn.Witches don't give up on their victims until they kill or destroy their victims.The power in witches controls them(witches).Witches hate real Christians.Witches can transform into cats,birds,rats,snakes and other animals to wreck havoc.On many occasions,I have had to silence evil cats and rats,by the power in d name of Jesus and His resurrection power.Witches are utmostly wicked;no pity or conscience in their books.This is how to kill a witch:(a)Become a child of the living God by accepting master Jesus Christ as your Lord and saviour.See Deu32:9 says,"d Lord's portion is His people".If you're a child of God,any witch that tries you must die violently.(b)Be an ardent and addicted reader of the Bible.You must know the world of God that's your weapon and immunity against witchcraft spells,magic,incantations,divinations,astral projection, and every other evil tactics they practice.(c)Be a dangerous prayer warrior.Pray consistently in the light and power of the Holy spirit.(d)Add consistent fasting to your prayers.(e)Live a holy life(1Pet1:16).Any witch that tries me and my family because of this write-up shall collide with the ROCK OF AGES and die in Jesus name and His resurrection power.Any witch that transforms into not only cats but elephants,that cats must die violently and d the tusks of the elephants must break and must die in the pool of its own blood in Jesus name and His resurrection power.Except witches repent by accepting Jesus as their master instead of satan,they must burn,not at stake this time around,but in HELL AND IN THE LAKE OF FIRE FOREVER.(REV21).

Anonymous said...

Oh dear, so much crap being dispensed. The statement that Christianity has killed more people is not quite right. What should have been stated was the Catholic Church has killed more people. And more wars have started in the name of religion than for any other reason. Those who claim to be witches/warlocks are just poor misguided souls in search of a purpose in life. If you want to read and quote from the bible get hold of a copy of the original text not the doctored up versions created by those who would control the masses.

Anonymous said...

i nearly crapped my pants listening to you dumb wiccans bitch about your relatives the "witches" being killed. its all for the great of cause since no body like you witch bitchez

B.Y.L said...

This is an extremely stupid argument. Why can't everyone get along? I mean seriously, we are all stuck here together, why not make the best of it? What is in the past, belongs in the past, this is our time, we can be different if we just move on with our lives. And in all honesty, I'm catholic and I really think religion separates us and only causes more hate and chaos in our world. It's beyond ignorance...but no one is listening so whatever.

Anonymous said...

Ihave a question to ask ijust recently killed a white owl and will i will like for you witches to answer if this is really badluck and/or death

Anonymous said...

I speak as an ORTHODOX Christian about a subject that most of u( Satanists,agnostics, and etc) people ignore. When we refer to Christianity there are two kinds of faith. The Orthodox and The Catholics, as you understand we talk about two COMPLETELY different religions! The most deaths and atrocities who had been recorded are from the CATHOLIC CHURCH! Not us.We didn't made any crusade or kill anyone because our principal law is to love each other as our selves. Ending this , u can't say about a think that u don't know

Anonymous said...

Yes, we wait a witness to save us...u are not even Christian! How u and all the others witnesses talk about Jesus? Arrogant bastards. Because of your fanatic behavior they think that Christianity is something bad...

Anonymous said...

Converting is illegal and none of religions convert people except Satanists and Witnesses...so we can't no mention that. Convert means force someone to choose the same religion beliefs that someone else has, instead of let him free to decide.Although, when we decide our way of faith, we should think that wisely and then see all the kind of faiths and then decide what we want. Most of people, specially teens, became atheists,or Satanists and etc just for do their rebellion. The Subject Faith is very important. I'm Christian Orthodox, with my own decision. I'm not say I'm perfect so does the other Christians, but who really is perfect? I won't defiantly say this bullshit like you gonna saved and etc. I just want everyone who read this comment, understand the reason of his/hers beliefs. Personally, I'm fully happy with the terms of my religion.Ending, I think that we should stop this religion debate, that comes to nowhere....just trying for a better world

. Sincerely, a trying-almost-to be good Christian